Nike Human Race

by admin on September 1, 2008

From Brother Samsonite:

The Nike Human Race. What an amazing concept and a great race!  Celebrating humanity through the medium of running!  26 cities around the world, 1,000,000 runners running on the same day.

Samsonite had almost registered for this event when he was at home during the summer, but was turned away because it was at 6pm on a Sunday night and he knew he’d never make it back to where he needed to be when he needed to be there.  Then the first week of school he realized that the race was on the Sunday of Labor Day weekend and that the Directorate of Cadet Activities was offering free entries to the race!  A small group of friends and Samsonite happily hopped on the freedom train to the race.

In order to achieve the whole “we are one” feeling, the race bib number was screened onto an Army Engineer red Nike Dri-Fit shirt, so it was a sea of scarlet bobbing up and down out there.  (Another thought is that this concept makes it easy to discourage and catch bandits on the course)  Despite worldwide acknowledgement of the color clash between red and orange, Samsonite wore his Piraña Brothers running cap so that the best colors could fly over NYC.

The race was held on Randall’s Island in NYC, and this created a problem getting all the runners to the start line.  At the time the gun was supposed to go off, there were still 5 ferry-loads of runners not en route to the island.  Since this day was all about solidarity, tolerance, patience, and embracing your fellow man, the race directors opted to wait until these runners arrived.  That was fine with Samsonite, but remember – this was New York City.  They call it a “New York minute” for a reason…  Many in the crowd were growing abrasive.  When the race did start it was under a cloud of, “It’s about friggin’ time, Boss!”

About 1 mile in Samsonite realized that this event was missing a certain peppy energy, and it was time for a few crazy cadets to make something happen.

“Free high-five!  High-fives fo’ free!”

Suffice it to say, Samsonite and his buddy Josh gave out a lot of free high-fives.

“Free high-five!  Here, take ten!  Where’s my change?  Wait, one more!  Put it in your pocket, save it for a rainy day!”

They high-fived the crowd, the volunteers, fellow runners, old men, beautiful young ladies – even the Naked Cowboy!

At the finish line someone told them that they were about 30 yards away from having caught and high-fived Matthew McConaughey!  (Samsonite would have given him the upside-down Longhorns hand-sign after his free high-five, too!)  At an event celebrating humankind, it was the least they could do to spread the only uniform language the world has ever known – that is, the language of the smile!

It was a 2-lap course, and their second lap – for some, it was still their first – was a practical exercise on The Bottleneck Principle.  The whole course was pretty narrow, but there was one particularly narrow foot bridge that everyone had to cross.  Josh and Samsonite had sailed through the first time, but when the slower runners began to amass at the bridge, uh oh!  On their second pass they easily lost 3 minutes waiting for the herd of cattle to move across.  Many people were antsy and angry at the congestion, so Josh and Samsonite – ambassadors of humanity – implored people to

“Make a friend!  Hug your neighbor!  Here, take a high-five and pass it back!”

People chuckled, smiled, and undoubtedly had a more memorable time because of these two crazy dudes.

It was also on this bridge that Samsonite branded Randall’s Island with the Piraña colors.  He had been carrying a Piraña sticker with him, looking for the perfect spot to slap it.  Seeing as people were all but crawling over this bridge, He decided that this would be the best high-visibility location – maybe they’d even memorize and visit the website!  Later that night he returned to the scene of the vandalism to take a picture.


The lights in the background at the stadium where we finished, a la Olympic Marathon style.

And the party continued…!  After the race was a free concert by the All-American Rejects. One of Samsonite’s more emo-centric buddies led them to the Emo Fest and they had a blast!  Samsonite even met a girl – a co-ed at NYU – there and got her number, too.  He has been saying that he needs to meet girls either on the start line of a race or in Sunday School.  We think that the post-race concert could count, too…

Overall, it was an awesome way to celebrate life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.  Go World.  Good job, Nike.

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